The Science of Roger McDonough's Sleep

me:

My young cousin said that academia
Was turning me from a nice hairy hobbit
Into a slippery skinny golem

-My precious, she could hear me say in the other room
As I typed away and looked over my articles,
My precious truth and knowledge

Later I heard a fog horn
Coming from my neighbor’s house
And looked up from my fish dinner

Sent at 12:52 PM on Sunday

Roger:

alas, you are lost

your meat paws

im still in love

crossed paths

pocketed water

more coffee

my liver has migrated

north

in my body

i spit blood for some reason

andrew and i drank

1 bottle of polish vodka, flavored with rowan berries

(picked after the 1st frost)

4 whiskeys each

2 beers

3 pink gins (each)

that's all

the night before last

and i am now without clarity

me:

i will carry the ash left from your city/ from your lost liver/ in my cuped hands/ to the tomatoe plant/ growing near that swampy area/ behind the house/

i have been completely alone for four days now.

i don't drink

i don't go outside

i translate

eat

do yoga

been writing in russian

Roger:

you are a ascetic

you are septic

me:

i never want to see another living soul again

i am the septic tank

Roger:

most souls are dead

me:

then you are welcome

Roger:

my dream

was this

me:

in my septic tank

Roger:

i was at a nightclub

and i was oggling a beautiful girl

and then i went to pee

and peeing the girls boyfriend

came out with the pee

I peed out her boyfriend

and he said

were you looking at my girl

me: yeah!

Roger:

and i said

I'm dying

of cancer

and he said - what are you doing in a club if you're dying of cancer

and i said

"que? que voy a parar de vivir antes de morirme?"

"what? Like im going to stop living

before i die?

and then he made me come out and repeat it to all the pool tables

and then i WOKE up

Sent at 1:01 PM on Sunday

me:

if i remember correctly water in the freudian interpretation

refers to sexuality

pee is water

from which potential rivalries

may appear

Roger: such as the man walking in.

me:

i think i am going to post your dream online

Roger:

where?

me:

either livejournal or on foundationpit

or both

it reminds me of a dream i had

which i can't recollect just now

although in my dream

when i finished peeing the guy out

i had transformed into the girl i was goggling over

and her boyfriend proceeded of fuck me right there in the bathroom

i was a woman roger

a woman being fucked by my own lust

i think your dream is a lot my palatable

heroic

quixotic

mine is just a feminist guilt trip

Sent at 1:12 PM on Sunday

Roger:

i love it! fucked by your own lust

yes

a feminist quilt trip